Here we are in the third week of May! That means we are on the third book of our “Ode to the Experts” series. This week, I’m highlighting First, Kill All the Marriage Counselors by Laura Doyle.

Laura Doyle really does it for me. I told you all about another of her books, The Surrendered Wife. Her principles are based on certain practices that some women find to be old school. I really think you should pick up this book, or any of Laura’s books, and decide for yourself.

First, Kill All the Marriage Counselors gives you “Six Intimacy Skills” to get you going on your journey to be an empowered woman AND wife. Actually, to quote the book, these are “6 intimacy skills that help a woman cultivate her raw female power and femininity.” Sounds pretty awesome to me. I’ve tried them, and I can tell you that they work!

  1. Replenish yourself with selfcare. Ladies, you know what this means. For the love of your marriage, you’ve gotta take some “me” time. That means, make that appointment for your weekly mani/pedi and KEEP IT! If you’re happy, your husband is happy. It’s true!
  2. Restore Respect. Here is where you find all that great advice to stop nagging, criticizing, and moaning over all the things your husband does and doesn’t do. Laura tells you that you’re helping no one by continuing to display this behavior. This is a hard one to take, ladies, when all we want is to make things run smoothly, like “Our Way.” Respect is major, and I think we forget how much our husbands really need this in order to thrive as men and as our partners.
  3. Relinquish control of your man. You have one thing you can control in life, YOU. Stop trying to make your man change. Ain’t gonna work.
  4. Receive. Laura writes, “Receiving is the ultimate act of giving up control.” Raise your hand if this one resonates with you! This type of receiving relates to anything from a compliment on your mani/pedi nail color to getting help with cooking dinner or cleaning out the basement.
  5. Reveal your heart. Vulnerability is always needed in any relationship, whether with your family, friends, or co-workers. Might as well knock it out of the park with your hubby.
  6. Refocus your view with gratitude. Basically, what Laura suggests here is to reframe your outlook on life with positivity and gratitude. Not so hard to do once you get focused on it!

If you’re struggling in your relationship or even getting into a new one, go ahead and grab a copy of this book. It will help change your romantic life for the better.

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